On this day, 1751 years ago, soon-to-be-saint Lawrence of Rome met his burny doom, if you're to believe the legends. It's a good story, so let's not worry about the facts.
Saint Lawrence is one of the patron saints of librarians - the others being Saint Jerome (who revised the Bible and pulled a thorn out of a lion's paw) and Saint Catherine of Alexandria (after whom the Catherine Wheel was named).
Lawrence of Rome was a deacon in the Catholic church at a time when it was very uncool to be a Christian in Rome. You were liable to end up getting fed to the lions for public entertainment.
He became the patron saint of librarians, as he was charged with the task of looking after all the treasures of the church. He wasn't perfect though. This one time, he was looking after the Holy Grail and he lost it. Apparently he left it at his parents' place in Spain, but the whereabouts of the Grail has been disputed ever since. Let this be a lesson to anybody who has kept things at their parents' place for safekeeping.
Anyway, eventually the Romans caught on that Lawrence was the guy in charge of the collection of Christian treasures, and told him that if he handed it all over to them for the greater glory of Rome, then they'd stop persecuting the Christians. However, the Romans didn't have the greatest reputation for keeping their word on such matters, and Lawrence was, justifiably, skeptical. He told them to give him three days.
He then went out, distributed the treasures to those he could trust, and then gathered all of the poor and sick people he could find, presenting them to the Romans, and saying "These are the true treasures of the Christian church."
And then the Romans killed him.
Not in the usual way, which was either beheading or crucifixion. No, they barbequed him to death. On a hot gridiron. Over red hot coals.
However, as he lay there dying, being charred to death, he turned to one of the Romans, and said, "You know what? I'm done on this side. Why don't you turn me over. Then you can eat me."
And so, for his sense of humour at inappropriate moments, he also became the patron saint of comedians.
And also, due to his unusual demise, the patron saint of chefs.
Happy Saint Lawrence Day.
6 comments:
That's the way to write history, methinks, but I wrote my essays like that, I doubt I'd get a very good mark.
Stories > Essays
First time I've heard this grail story...thanks...why exactly do academics include Imperial Rome as part of Western Civ???...
A fantastic way to teach history!!
I wish more of our lessons were so humorous!!
Funny - I like it! Methinks he "lost" the cup to protect it from those Romans ...
I thought Saint Jerome was the patron saint of librarians. Is it possible they both are?
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